STOP PRESS: 306 MPs DECIDE WHETHER 62MILLION PEOPLE WANT TO ENTER EURO
Monday, May 21, 5:02 pm
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YOU KNOW IT'S not f***ing easy being me. There's always some w***er trying to diss me. Yeah, well, okay I gave one to that bastard from Mont, Monto – yeah, well, that foreign country we played and those bastards in UEFA have f***ing dumped me. You'd think they knew anything about soccer. So I'll...
IN AN ACT of defiance following his recent Court appearances, the Guv of the Bank of England, Ronnie King together with his twin brother Reg have thrown caution to the wind, along with £75 billion of other people's money. Speaking at a news conference at the Blind Beggar venue in London's fashionable Whitechapel, a...
1972, Aged 12, Secondary school: IT WAS ONLY in secondary school that I started to flourish. It was there that I began to act in some minor roles—Tom Thumb, Gullivers travels, Snow White, Streeb Grubling. I always got cast as the small guy, but God I loved it. There under the spotlight, the...
SPORTS FROM THE BULL THE CURRENT RUGBY world cup has been very enjoyable with matches conveniently broadcast from New Zealand at 7 and 9 a.m, allowing coffee, eggs and bacon to be consumed and the needs of your family totally ignored. One feature has been the respect for national anthems (even the English) and...
NICOLAS BENT TO pick a buttercup and handed it to Carla. Carla's heart fluttered as his fingertips touched hers. "These, my dear," said Nicoals Sarkozy, pointing to some shrubbery, "are roses tremières and those are ornithogala pyramidales." Carla's legs turned to jelly. "Blimey!" she thought in her native cockney accent which she so cunningly...
NOT TO BE OUTDONE by the Conservative Chancellor George Osborne, Labour leader Ed Milliband received a whipping from several hundred members of the Trades Union Congress in London earlier this week. Cartoonist and caricaturist Simon Ellinas.
THE FORMER LABOUR Chancellor has released his memoirs to disclose several shocking revelations about Gordon Brown's administration as Prime Minister: 1) He failed to grasp the seriousness of the recession 2) There was an atmosphere of crisis and chaos 3) The Pope is Catholic 4) Bears shit in the woods 5) The sky is...
YES, THAT'S RIGHT. Another Stephen Fry book signing session in Waterstones. Cartoons and caricatures by Simon Ellinas
Cartoonist
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