BorisBlog! – 3
CRIKEY! SORRY TO exhume a theme given the BJ once-over in an earlier blog, but have you seen the latest opinion polls? Don’t bother! Horribile dictu, we’ve slipped into hung parliament terrain when we should be firmly in Tory hanging and flogging territory. By rights the Louts’ Party should be a diminishing dot in the Toff Party’s rear-view mirror. One moment we’re twenty points ahead of the oiks. Brown & Out they are, skulking down the Westminster corridors looking for a Blairite Brutus for Gordo to say “Et tu?” at as he slides to the floor with the blades of umpteen House of C steak knives planted either side of his vertebrae. The next moment our Flash is back from the dead like some spawn-of-the-manse Freddy Kruger trashing our dreams of dispatch boxes & expenses claims. What the UK is going on, I hear you ask!
& Speaking of coming back from the dead, have you seen the latest Sherlock Holmes at the Talkies yet? The one by Mr. ex-Madonna? The one where Lord Blackwood gets his neck stretched then does a Lazarus to seize power, recapture the thirteen colonies & “Fulfil England’s Destiny!” by spreading the benefits of all things British over a grateful planet? If ever there was a rallying cry for putting some oomph back into our flagging election campaign then that was it! In a populist touch, bound to go big with the punters, the first item on Blackwood’s ‘To Do’ List is the selective gassing of unsound MPs in the H of Commons. I was spraying popcorn three rows ahead of me cheering his Lordship on! Mind you, in a plot twist I still can’t get a handle on, said master plan is stuffed by the eponymous consultant detective even as the blameless Lord B gets shuffled off his mortal coil. What is it with lefty scribes of the screen? Political correctness gone mad, or what? Naturally, the party-pooping sleuth had to be played by some yank. A case of enlightened Limey rule being stymied by the Great Satan, yet again! Where have we seen that before, I wonder? Eh, Anthony Eden? Eh, George III?
