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Category: Article
Boris Blog #4
By Guy Carter on Feb 17, 2010 in Article, Authors, Boris Blog, Carter's View, Guy Carter, Humour, Politics
WHAT A WEEK! What IS all this leaking out of the Lubyanka? The Politburo has come up with a real corker this time. ‘Josef’ Brown has spotted a flaw in the First-Past-The-Post electoral system: the flaw being he won’t be able to continue as commissar after the morning of May 7th.
No tea & biscuits with [...]
BorisBlog! – 3
By Guy Carter on Feb 07, 2010 in Article, Authors, Boris Blog, Carter's View, Guy Carter, Humour, News, Politics
CRIKEY! SORRY TO exhume a theme given the BJ once-over in an earlier blog, but have you seen the latest opinion polls? Don’t bother! Horribile dictu, we’ve slipped into hung parliament terrain when we should be firmly in Tory hanging and flogging territory. By rights the Louts’ Party should be a diminishing dot in the [...]
Boris Blog – The Recession is over!
WELL, THAT’S THAT! We can crack open the Cava and spray each other like a triumvirate of F1 tax exiles prancing about on a podium. The recession, it seems, is over. Yes, my friends, it appears that the economy – whatever that was – has enlarged by a piddling nought-point-nought-piffling-one percent & that, yet again, [...]
That Chilcott Iraq War Enquiry Interview with Tony Blair – IN FULL!
CHILCOTT: Did you do anything wrong?
BLAIR: No.
CHILCOTT: I think that concludes our business here, gentlemen.
Boris Blog!
By Guy Carter on Jan 22, 2010 in Article, Authors, Boris Blog, Carter's View, Featured, Guy Carter, Humour, News, Politics
What-ho, peasants!
Your Humble Bumbler here. I just thought I’d slope off from my Dick Whittington duties to dip the old quill in squid’s bile & pen a few thoughts about the impending arrival at your doorstep of complete strangers laying claim to the contents of your ballot slip. Yes, my friends. The Election That Never [...]
Disgraced MPs dress code
By Guy Carter on Oct 24, 2009 in Article, Authors, Detritus, Guy Carter, Ha! Archives, Ha! History, Humour, Issue 5
Archives, issue 2, Jan 1995
Ref: Tory sex scandal, David Mellor and Antonia de Sancha
IN MORE ROBUST times than ours, any courtier who incurred the monarch’s displeasure was stripped of his finery, kitted out in sackcloth and ashes and paraded through the streets for the amusement of the commoners. From ‘His Grace’ to disgrace was but [...]
I wish the moaning military would leave our brave politicians alone!
Frontline political reporting from Tim Leatherbarrow.
RECENTLY TWO OF our brave ministers packed their summer gear and factor 300 suncream and flew out to meet ‘our boys’ on the front line (or about 30 miles behind it).
While they were there bravely shaking hands with the troopers before dinner, one big-mouthed little swine blurted out:
“When are we [...]
I Was an Amateur Thespian
IT’S A STRANGE hobby for a grown man. Not for me the sedentary delights of stamp collecting, train spotting or constructing model aeroplanes out of lollipop sticks. I spend my evenings and weekends larking about in draughty community halls, putting on make-up and humiliating myself in public. No, I haven’t joined Gordon Brown’s election campaign [...]
Zoo-illogical Gardens
By simonelli on Oct 01, 2009 in Article, Authors, Ha! Archives, Ha! History, Humour, Issue2, Simon Ellinas
ARCHIVE: Amended from Issue 2, January 1995
LONDON ZOO IS a good place to go if you want to look at animals. But then so are the Houses of Parliament or any tube train in the rush hour.
A visit to the zoo always raises suspicions that the animals are also looking at us.
Recently a crowd of [...]
Andrew Marr: How to make friends and influence Prime Ministers
NEW!
Frontline political reporting from Tim Leatherbarrow.
IT’S EASY. YOU sit our glorious leader down on a comfortable chair in a nice well lit room and with a smile on your oily BBC- trained face . You accuse the most powerful and useless man in the country of popping prescription drugs to ease the stress of the [...]
Nightmare at Primark!
By simonelli on Sep 24, 2009 in Article, Authors, Featured, Ha! Archives, Ha! History, Humour, Issue 4, Simon Ellinas
ARCHIVE. Amended from original in issue 4, May 1995.
YOU’RE WALKING DOWN a crowded street and to your horror, you notice the people looking at you and laughing. They’re pointing at your nether regions and when you look down, you notice that you are not wearing anything but a skimpy sleeveless vest.
For an unfortunate few this [...]
A Cartoonist Writes…
By simonelli on Sep 23, 2009 in Article, Authors, Ha! Archives, Ha! History, Humour, Issue 1, Simon Ellinas
ARCHIVE. Amended from original in issue 1, September 1994.
IS CARTOONING VIEWED as a ‘folk art’ along with macramé, pottery and morris dancing?
As a cartoonist I am often asked, “Why don’t you bugger off?” This is usually from prospective clients.
One receives the impression that cartoons are expected to be free, or at least, cheap.
The rejection [...]
