YOU ARE CORDIALLY invited to apply for membership to the most exclusive members' club in Oxford University.
The Bullingdon Club
If you're an Old Etonian, thoroughly stashed with cash and are, quite frankly, totally entitled to rule the country, you may be eligible.
The benefits of joining the Bullingdon:
• You don't work for your exams, your servants do it for you
• Network with likeminded future rulers, captains of industry and men who can't keep their trousers up
• Smash up restaurants and set fire to toilets the David Cameron and Boris Johnson way!
The Bullingdon Club: Smash it, crash it but don't worry, Ma and Pa will cash it.